{"product_id":"slice-to-meet-you","title":"Slice To Meet You","description":"\u003cp\u003eThe original intake form had a section for threat level and a section for affect.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSomeone filled in friendly under threat level. No one corrected it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSlice To Meet You was cataloged on a Thursday. By Friday, two analysts had rearranged their desks to face it. By Saturday, one of them had named it. The name they chose was not Slice To Meet You. That came from a different file, written by someone who had never seen the object and described it anyway with complete accuracy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe grin is not painted. Imaging confirmed the pigmentation is structural. Whatever the expression is doing, it was decided before the object existed.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThere is a note in the archive connecting this artifact to a prior contact event. The note references a landing. A wrong one. The note was written before the landing occurred. The filing date has been reviewed three times. The filing date is correct.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIt passed inspection because nothing about it looked dangerous.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNothing about it looks dangerous.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis has not changed.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":46857318105257,"sku":"21794373970134395432","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ S","offer_id":46857318138025,"sku":"11872460532296094337","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":46857318170793,"sku":"26185181608305149854","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ M","offer_id":46857318203561,"sku":"30352165093916925562","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":46857318236329,"sku":"40614071573647523777","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ L","offer_id":46857318269097,"sku":"10922026267138192095","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":46857318301865,"sku":"22878963087302330654","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ XL","offer_id":46857318334633,"sku":"22102823999832036397","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":46857318367401,"sku":"21281025192920786328","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ 2XL","offer_id":46857318400169,"sku":"13558908259463863845","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0731\/9653\/5977\/files\/20260307221419-1f11a72f-cc21-68d0-8836-8e49dfc953d8.png?v=1772921909","url":"https:\/\/budgiverse.com\/products\/slice-to-meet-you","provider":"Budgiverse","version":"1.0","type":"link"}